Organic chemistry is the make-it or break-it class for students vying for admission to the limited openings in veterinary colleges. I survived the course and garnered a coveted spot into Colorado State, but was nearly killed in the process because while studying fractionating distillations, I asked the lab instructor, “What is the difference between what we are doing and making moonshine?”

“Nothing,” he responded; an answer which sparked me to build a still while home over spring break. It probably would have been safer to spend spring break in the traditional manner—partying on the beaches of Mexico watching trust-funder college co-eds record “Girls Gone Wild” videos. The worst fate I could suffer there would have been my moral decay and alcohol poisoning both of which could be fixed by a short stint in re-hab. Instead, I went home to help with the calving and when I wasn’t feeding, tagging calves, or cleaning the barn I was in the basement building my still; a decision which nearly terminated me plus my closest relatives. It’s far more dangerous growing up a ranch kid than a trust-funder.

Project Moonshine was only half done when I returned to the university at the end of spring break; bottling would wait until I returned home for Easter break. So after Easter dinner with both my teetotalling grandmothers joining us, I excused myself from the table, hustled into the basement and bottled four quarts of what I suspected was 95 percent ethanol. There are safe ways to test the alcohol content, but such methods escaped me at the moment, so I calculated the exact boiling point for a grain alcohol solution given the current barometric pressure around my mother’s kitchen stove top. I returned from the basement to the kitchen and said not a word as I poured a pint of my moonshine into a pot, immersed Mom’s candy thermometer and turned up the heat. Bingo—my grain alcohol hit a rapid boil at the exact temperature I had calculated. I smugly grinned at my brilliance and turned off the propane stove which unfortunately, had a quirky flaw of woofing as it extinguished. End of story. You have enough data to connect the dots and mentally draw the final picture of what happens when you boil alcohol over an open flame, so I will jump to my political point.

This March, Montana’s House Judiciary Committee had the sense of mind to table Representative Hill’s (D-Missoula) HB527, an Act creating the offense of cyber bullying. Arguments were made this law was needed as Montana is the only state in the union without such legislation. Not only did we bottle up HB527, we successfully defended an attempt by the House Democrats and some of the Responsible Republicans to force the bill from committee to the House floor. Collectivists want this bill because it is like hate crime legislation where once fully implemented, citizens can be convicted for something they only thought about doing. Read that sentence again; I’ll wait. Perhaps you have heard all the anti-bullying radio ads; segments which are probably on television, but since I do not have television I cannot say with certainty. The left wants government to have this power, so this legislation will pop up again in 2015. With HB527 fresh in your mind, let’s connect the dots to the current scandals at the federal level.

Unless you have been living under a rock, you have heard the National Security Agency (NSA), has been monitoring and data banking electronic communications of American citizens for several years. Experts are claiming every key stroke from your lap top or smart phone has been data-based with the NSA regardless whether you sent or deleted it. Your intent has been forever recorded as a part of your identity. Astute readers have beaten me to the punch, connected the dots between HB527 and the NSA, and are frantically searching their memories for any nasty grams they composed, but never sent. Less astute readers are dismissing the actions of the NSA as meaningless because they have done nothing wrong so have nothing to hide. Answer me this: What will you do when the “thought police” arrest you for expressing opinions outside what the government deems acceptable? It is not much of a stretch once you connect the dots.