My formative years in ranching, taught me there are three foodstuffs which are so inexpensive you can’t justify raising your own. I should probably keep my findings secret, so as to not discombobulate the well thought out family chore calendar hanging on the refrigerator of every ranch family in America, but concealing such knowledge is selfish. It is my obligation to share my vast wisdom with the masses. (I bet a few left-wingers prolapsed over that sentence.) Here are the three foodstuffs: Chicken, milk, and potatoes.

The data for today’s column originates from my vast experience in raising chickens. (Milk and potatoes will be discussed in future columns.) I raised chickens once. It was the summer of my fourth grade year and when I added up the time I spent feeding, watering and butchering chickens, I figured I wasted 27 years in one single summer. Fortunately a blood thirsty skunk put me out of business before my father could expand my operation.

Because it had been such a valuable learning experience for me, when I became the dad I considered forcing my kids into the chicken business. While gathering current data about chicken husbandry, I found some great information about the niche market of free-range chickens. Marketing experts have discovered the term “free-range” conveys the image of happy chickens with smiles on their beaks, wandering the prairie eating organic grasshoppers while being tended by a skinny, freckle-faced kid wearing PF Flyers. This prompts consumers to willingly part with obscene amounts of money because they feel they are saving the planet every time they order free-range chicken wings. (Don’t ask me to explain their logic.)

Just so you know, free-range chicken is an ill defined term. Chickens can be raised in confinement, but they can qualify as free-range if they are allowed access out of doors for 30 minutes every day. Factory farms, those establishments held in slightly lower esteem than Auschwitz to the “clean and green” crowd, can meet free-range requirements by simply opening a small access door to an exercise pen for a half hour. Do you know what factory farmed confined chickens do the second the door is opened? Answer: Nothing…absolutely nothing; you can’t even chase them out. They ceased being chickens generations ago and have become so conditioned to free food, housing and healthcare they have no desire to step out into the sunlight. Choosing security over freedom, they blindly remain indoors until they are slaughtered at six weeks of age; this is exactly where America is today and this brings me to my point.

Years ago we were a nation of patriots, and in the Declaration of Independence our founders pledged their “lives, fortunes and sacred honor,” for freedom. Sadly, that passion is gone, replaced by citizens demanding food, housing and healthcare provided by anyone who has dared to earn one more dollar than they. Progressives have built an empire capitalizing on this human frailty and today people of need are held in higher esteem than people of production. Failure and mediocrity of both individuals and businesses are rewarded with government programs and bailouts.

This past year I have been traveling Montana speaking before any audience about liberty. I’ve been to Columbus, Red Lodge, Ekalaka, Pony, Chinook, Sidney, Big Timber, Glendive, Billings, and Moses Lake, Washington. (These are the biggies on the freedom speaker’s circuit.) Some days are rewarding. Other days I feel like I’m trying to herd factory chickens out into the sunlight all while they are asking, “Who is the nut in the cowboy hat that keeps propping that dang door open?”

America needs your help; she’s lost her taste for liberty. If you have a flock of chickens you can’t seem to chase to freedom, give me a call and I will come help. Let not a day go by without doing at least one thing to advance the cause of freedom